Monday, October 26, 2015
my no bday excuse
It's really not me trying to be a Debbie Downer, but birthdays aren't an extremely big deal for me., especially since leaving Hawaii and all my family. Birthdays back home consisted of the closest Sunday to your birthday Daddy making steaks on the grill and on the day of your birthday, Aunty Patty would always make whatever dinner you wanted. And Aunty Eileen and Aunty Karen coming down on those Sundays. More so Aunty Karen because her Birthday comes on the day following mine so we would always celebrate it together. I do miss those days. and I do miss my family back home.
I felt bad that my boss felt bad for not giving me the day off. It was totally fine. If I wanted the day off I would have requested it. Birthdays don't just pop up out of nowhere where I would have "forgot" to request off. Sadly one thing with me is that my job comes before anything. If I requested off, that would have messed with other manager's routine schedules. I hardly request any days off, I don't vacation anywhere, I schedule appointments around my work shifts. The last time I missed a shift was when I pulled my calf other then that if I'm feeling like death, I still make it to work.
If I had family here or someone to share days off with, maybe I would take advantage of time off requests, but I don't. But just because technically I'm alone, I try not to show that I'm a miserable mess. I still smile, and talk to people, and laugh, and to be honest the way that we treat others is all that really matters. Is my way of thinking wrong when I say that just as long as you treat others with respect and care about others it doesn't matter what you struggle with behind closed doors? Everything else in this world is bigger then the crap we deal with in our own lives. So if you can make a difference in someone else's day and put a smile on their face, then why not do it, no matter how depressed you are.
What sparked this entry was the "aww why not, it's your birthday" that came from a friend simply asking why I wasn't doing anything for my birthday. I don't get upset or sad when people say that, but I feel the slight pity, behind their words. lol Birthdays are just another reminder that I'm getting old and I have nothing to show for it. Well besides my weirdness. And I'm awesome :-)