Alright since the last time I wrote, I was trying to make a vlog. well I made videos but couldn't get them to upload on this site properly. So I saw there was the you tube upload option. So I did that and it worked. I made several videos and made several vlog entries on here, but put them back in "drafts" as they are too weird. Yeah I know, me caring about the weird things I do. but I pulled them because they were pointless. kinda like my regular typed entries... haha, anywhos lets get back to what has happened since that last blog...
So I got my own place. It's easier to get to work. It's a bit bigger then I expected, and yes I did come to see the place before signing a lease, but thought my stuff would fill out the place. Seriously, I could fit all my shit in my bedroom.. and I have a lot of shit. It does get lonely, I think I cried the first 2 nights I was here. sadness I know. I talk to myself alot more, but that's just crazy me and I was always like that. Getting into music again. I need to update my iPod with current stuff, cuz everything is oooooold as fuck. It's sad I don't know alot of new bands out there. People tell me all the time, Oh Skully, you like to listen to so and so... and I'm like who?... makes me feel so old and out of date. Meh, but most likely the old shit is faaaar better then the new crap that's flooding the radio stations these days I guess... But I wouldn't know, because I don't even listen to the radio. lol
I've been burying myself in work as of late. Staying later to get shit done, not taking breaks or lunches. feeling like I'm gonna freak out at work. I sort of did yesterday. Strongly worded email venting some frustrations, but nothing serious or job jeopardizing. Finding another job is not a far fetched idea either. I'll give it till the end of the year before I start making rash decisions, then again, it might not be considered a rash decision. I know I'm worth more and I do so much more for that store then I should. One day it'll sink in and I'll do something about it... but that days is not today.
It's slightly an insecurity thing, but mainly it's a "I know what the fuck I look like with my clothes off and it ain't pretty" mentality... why do guys always think that all girls look hot naked... I am definatly someone that knows I look a hell of a lot better with my clothes ON. and I always say that, I've never been one to say otherwise. When I say it, it's more of like a warning to them. But then there are the ones that really like you for the person that you are and it don't matter what your body looks like. I thought I had someone like that. I'm sure my own body hang ups probably lead to the problems we had, but when I get told that the "other person's" body was perfect, that's when you feel like shit all over again. But meh. whatever, it is what it is. I can't do anything about it. If I was rich I probably would get plastic surgery. no, not probably, I definitely would. And lypo wouldn't be something I would get. I've lost close to 100 lbs before on my own, and I'm trying so hard to do it again. I'm half way there.
Yay me!
Haven't been playing WoW a lot lately. No real reason, just haven't had the time. Well besides, the 4 people I played with the most has temporarily left the game. Monk moved back home, Bevy and Steven are taking a break, and Jugga is playing other MMOs. I don't feel like I've been abandoned at all lols sadness. j/k I actually slowed down because I'm trying to pretend that my life doesn't suck balls and work, make money, pay my bills, and do what ever the fuck I want with no one nagging the shit out of me.
I'm tired, it's only 7. I think Ima go to sleep!!!
